Kevin Stilley

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Kevin Stilley on For Christ and Culture Radio

I am a frequent contributor to the For Christ and Culture radio program hosted by Barry Creamer daily on KCBI radio FM 90.9.

Here are links to some of the shows on which I have appeared.

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Good Advice For Young Men?

Twenty-seven years ago at a Baptist Men’s Brotherhood breakfast the featured speakers stood in front of us with his fifteen-year-old son at his side.

“I am going to ask you this morning to do me and my son a great honor; I am going to ask you to speak into his life. Will you share with him out of your own personal experience some of the wisdom you have gained. What is the best advice you can give my son about the way he live’s his life.”

One by one men began to rise and share from their heart.

Many years have gone by but I thought about that morning recently when I read the following list of practical advice put together by H. Jackson Brown, Jr..

  1. Marry the right person. This one decision will determine 90% of your happiness or misery.

  2. Work at something you enjoy and that’s worthy of your time and talent.

  3. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

  4. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.

  5. Be forgiving of yourself and others.

  6. Be generous.

  7. Have a grateful heart.

  8. Persistence, persistence, persistence.

  9. Discipline yourself to save money on even the most modest salary.

  10. Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated.

  11. Commit yourself to constant improvement.

  12. Commit yourself to quality.

  13. Understand that happiness is not based on possessions, power or prestige, but on relationship with people you love and respect.

  14. Be loyal.

  15. Be honest.

  16. Be a self-starter.

  17. Be decisive even it it means you’ll sometimes be wrong.

  18. Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for every area of your life.

  19. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you’ll regret the things you didn’t do more than the ones you did.

  20. Take good care of those you love.

  21. Don’t do anything that wouldn’t make your Mom proud.

I have been thinking about the men who are speaking into my own fifteen-year-old son’s life.  What are they are saying?  All of the items listed above are good, but it seems to have some important things missing.

So, I am standing before you with my fifteen-year-old son beside me.

“I am going to ask you to do me and my son a great honor; I am going to ask you to speak into his life. Will you share with him out of your own personal experience some of the wisdom you have gained. What is the best advice you can give my son about the way he live’s his life.”

Please use the comment section below to share your thoughts.

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In the book Teknon and the Champion Warriors, Brent Sapp recommends the following as informative and thoughtful resources for a father to use with his son. What do you think of his recommendations? [There is at least one that I would never consider.] What would you add to his list?

I Kissed Dating Goodbye, by Joshua Harris

Right From Wrong, by Josh McDowell

In the Shadow of the Almighty, by Elisabeth Elliott

Through Gates of Splendor, by Elisabeth Elliott

The Book of Virtues, edited by William Bennett

The Picture of Dorian Gray, by Oscar Wilde

The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, by C.S. Lewis

The Moral Compass, edited by William Bennett

Dominion, by Randy Alcorn

Left Behind, by Tim Lahaye and Jerry Jenkins

This Present Darkness, by Frank E. Peretti

Piercing the Darkness, by Frank E. Peretti

The Testament, by John Grisham

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Fathers and Sons – select quotes

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Women Reading The Bible

According to Barna Group’s 2011 annual State of the Church Report, Bible reading for women has declined by 10 percentage points during the last two decades; in 1991 half all American women indicated that they read their Bible during a typical week, today only 40% indicate that they read their Bible weekly. However, men are no less likely to read from the Bible these days than they were 20 years ago (41% in 2001, 40% in 1991).

This prompts the question of why the percentage has declined among women but not among men. I would not hazard a guess as to what factor or factors have led to this phenomena but I feel compelled to at least consider some possibilities. When historians see changes in one community but not in another they typically look at what might be influencing the affected community but not the unaffected community. For instance, when considering the Fall of Rome, a responsible historian will ask what factors were affecting the Western Roman Empire, but not the Eastern Roman Empire [Byzantine Empire] because the Eastern Roman Empire was thriving during the same time frame.

Can you think of change that has occurred during the last two decades that has affected women more than men and might be instrumental in women reading their Bible less than they did two decades ago?

__________

Related:

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A Healthy Church

I recently read an article called “Seven Indicators of Church Health.”  Here are the indicators the author points to:

VIBRANT SPIRITUALITY
ENTHUSIASTIC VOLUNTEER SERVICE
TRUSTED LEADERSHIP
EXPRESSION OF COMPASSION
GENEROSITY IN FINANCES
GENUINE COMMUNITY
SALVATION ANTICIPATED

I can’t help but wonder why the strange absence of the Bible or Sound Doctrine from this list?  If you were making a list of indicators, what would appear on your list?

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Priesthood of the Believer

Bill Hull came up with five basic principles of church polity and practice based upon a composite understanding of the five biblical passages that address the priesthood of the believer; 1 Peter 2:5; 1 Peter 2:9, Rev. 1:5-6, Rev. 5:9-10, and Rev. 20:6. I am not saying that Hull’s five principles are wrong, but I am not sure that all of them are necessary inferences from the these particular texts. Take a look at his list, and the Scripture passages that follow them. Do you think the list of principles he shares are natural conclusions from the five biblical passages? If not, do you think they are accurate? If accurate, where would you go in Scripture to argue for their truthfulness?

1. The priesthood of the believer must be held in healthy tension with other basic concepts; it is not absolute.

2. The believer can delegate some of the authority of his life and ministry to other believers.

3. The priesthood of the believer is conditioned by the gifts and roles in the life of the fellowship.

4. The priesthood of the believer implies shared responsibility and ministry as well as shared authority.

5. The priesthood of the believer is the basis for decision-making in the church.

1 Peter 2:5 – you yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house, to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.

1 Peter 2:9 – But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.

Revelation 1:5-6 – and from Jesus Christ the faithful witness, the firstborn of the dead, and the ruler of kings on earth. To him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by his blood 6 and made us a kingdom, priests to his God and Father, to him be glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.

Revelation 5:9-10 – And they sang a new song, saying,

“Worthy are you to take the scroll
and to open its seals,
for you were slain, and by your blood you ransomed people for God
from every tribe and language and people and nation,
and you have made them a kingdom and priests to our God,
and they shall reign on the earth.”

Revelation 20:6 – Blessed and holy is the one who shares in the first resurrection! Over such the second death has no power, but they will be priests of God and of Christ, and they will reign with him for a thousand years.

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What Do You Think?

If you could take back something you said in the last year, what would it be?

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Youth Group Reading List

I saw the following list of books on a Church Youth Group Reading List. The inclusion of some of these titles makes me want to weep. What books would you include on a youth group reading list?

Book List
Crazy Love – Francis Chan
In A Pit With A Lion On A Snowy Day – Mark Batterson
Wild Goose Chase – Mark Batterson
Wide Awake – Erwin McManus
Stand Against the Wind – Erwin McManus
Unstoppable Force – Erwin McManus
Uprising – Erwin McManus
Searching For God Knows What – Donald Miller
To Own a Dragon – Donald Miller
Vintage Jesus – Mark Driscoll
Reaching out without selling out – Mark Driscoll
Same Kind of Different As Me – Ron Hall and Denver Moore
It’s Not Ok with Me – Janine Maxwell
The Irresistible Revolution – Shane Claiborne
Death by Suburb – David Goetz
Know What You Believe – Paul Little
Know Why You Believe – Paul Little
A Long Way Gone – Ishmael Beah
I Am Not But I Know I Am – Louie Giglio
Ragamuffin Gospel – Brennan Manning
If You Want to Walk On Water, You Have To Get Out Of the Boat – John Ortberg
Be the Change – Zac Hunter
What Jesus Demands from the World – John Piper
The Cost of Discipleship – Bonhoeffer
90 Minutes in Heaven – Don Piper
The Shack – William Young
Louder Than Words – Andy Stanley
I Don’t Have Enough Faith to Be An Atheist – Ravi Zacharias, Norman Geisler
Who Made God? And Answers to Over 100 Other Tough Questions of Faith – Ravi Zacharias, Norman Geisler
Brave Enough to Follow – Stuart Briscoe
Time Bandits – Stuart Briscoe
It: How Churches and Leaders Can Get It and Keep It – Craig Groeschel
Max Q – Andy Stanley / Hall

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What Do You Think?

How are you building a loving, caring, trusting relationship with the people in your church?

(Share your thoughts in the comment section below.)

Examples:

  • Follow Up! Even if no response, keep reaching out.
  • Keep prayer logs
  • Engage the whole family.
  • Ask “How can I pray for you?” God uses prayer time to build love for them.
  • Email, Text, Phone, Notes, Visits, Social Media
  • Weekly meetings, monthly get together
  • Sporting Events
  • Don’t take it personally when group members don’t respond
  • Cards, Meals, Hospital Visits, Road Trips
  • Be available
  • Be authentic!
  • Prayer & Encouragement
  • Be vulnerable
  • Admit when you are wrong

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